Rant 264 20/9/12 Subject: People that don't know how to apologise properly

Rant number 264

I'm sure that you have heard Nick Cleggs 'apology' by now - either as a standard recording or as an autotuned remix.

Either way - I am reliably informed that a good way to get that disgusting taste out of your mouth is a combination of borax, iodine, laudanum and surgical spirit.

I am almost lost for words...almost. I'm fucking well not though - I'm livid.

Nick Clegg, a man with the charisma and appeal of a white dog turd has done very little to endear himself as the Liberal Democrat leader. For a start - he put his middle finger up to everyone who voted for them - by getting into bed with their supposed rivals.

It wasn't even like they went in for an equal partnership of course - no, Nick Clegg has never ever been more than David's bitch.

He's been a delightful fall guy from the start too, transposing his already non-existent appeal into genuine repulsion.

Maybe sensing that many of his voters were a 'little' disappointed with him, he's been a big man and said 'sorry.' Which I would respect him for if it wasn't so woefully underhandedly halfhearted.

You see, back at the baby-kissing stage, where they will promise you anything in exchange for your cross in the right box they said 'Vote for us and we will vote against any raise in tuition fees.'
People did vote for them (stupidly, me included - set of bastards), and and they didn't - which is really kind of shit.

Nick didn't go on record today to apologise for going back on his promise. He went on record to apologise for making the promise in the first place.

That Nick Clegg - You fucking cunt is not the same thing by any stretch of the imagination.

If I say to you that you smell like a sewer, then apologise for telling you - that's still insulting, because I've only apologised for the words - not the sentiment. I may not be privately educated like Nick Clegg but I am quite able to understand how pathetically insincere your apology is.

As for gaining my trust again. You never had it in the first place. If a politician looked me in the eye and told me that the grass was green - I'd have to check it hadn't changed colour.

You may have thought you could gain some trust back - but you've managed to alienate me further. A round of applause for that matey - I really didn't think it was possible.

Nick Clegg - simply: Take your apology, print it out - then mail it to someone who gives a fuck.

Rant over.