Rant 84 - 24/3/12 Subject: Shout town centre do-gooders

Rant number 84


Inadvertently - despite my best efforts to the contrary, almost every weekend I need to go into town for one reason or another. Today I needed to buy some trousers and pick up some post - nothing particularly exotic.

As I headed towards the post office however, the faint tones of a bull-horn could be heard: spitting rhetoric of great banality into the atmosphere and - to my ear canal.

Today, it was people talking about the 'slave labour' that is forced upon the 'poor' long term doll monkeys. Although this rant is not about this issue or those who contest it, I do feel that some important points must be stated:

Firstly: although I do not feel that anyone should have to work force nearly nout - those who have been long term unemployed are evidently lacking in experience - something that this scheme should be able to offer.
Secondly: decisions of this sort are made at head office level, not in individual stores (they were outside of Primark.)
Thirdly: No-one likes to listen to a pretentious, self important, trumped up, rhetoric reciting little wanker.

Despite the fact that, to a certain extent I do agree with some of the points he made - the way he was presenting them got right up my nose. I felt like going and crushing his logic with my own (a feat which I feel I am more than capable of.)

The thing is, someone like this is out every weekend, adding to the misery that is town on Saturday. Always with a clipboard, a bullhorn & a badly printed set of signs & posters (I actually wonder if there is some kind of 'pissing people off in town on Saturday' kit for hire?)

Its usually some protest group of some sort, students about fees, socialists against society, midgets about heightism possibly? I faze it out and find it just exasperating.

Why don't they take the protest somewhere where it matters. This government have proved completely that they don't read petitions, regardless of how many signatures you can irritate out of people.

So - just stop!

Rant over.

Rant 64 - 04/3/12 Subject: Retail seasoning

Rant number 64


To begin with, I should probably make it clear that retail seasoning is not actually some kind of tinned or jarred flavor enhancing powder. I'm talking about seasons (as in bits of the year) not seasoning!

So, what the hell am I talking about?

The seasons that retailers work to - in order to sell, sell, sell & sell - and ipso facto, the spreading of various world events to epic proportions.

From early February for instance, there has been advertisements for Easter. Easter eggs, chocolate, the whole shebang! Bear in mind, that Easter does not occur until April this year - this thrusting it upon us is just ludicrous. And once Easter is done, there will be a sale no doubt.

Then, to follow there will be summer season - barbecues, shorts, swimming costumes - the works (even though summer will still be some way off.)

There will then be an autumn sale, just in time for the head of summer - because you just can't have enough autumnal stuff when you are basking in the summer sun - you know.

Then, it will be time - by the time Autumn has taking off its coat, hung it up and is sitting down with a well earned glass of ale to sell fireworks and scary masks (bonfire night and halloween respectively.)

And then, it will be endlessly Christmas from November onwards, until the January sales - when it will all begin again.

Its just bloody annoying that there is always this forced expectation that something will be gone before you have time to buy it. Its just not true - there will be just as many easter eggs before easter as weeks before. Only idiots feel the need to buy them months before!

Don't buy things too far in advance - allow the rubbish to sit on the fucking retailers shelves - that'll show em!

Rant over.