Rant 316 11/11/12 Subject: Star wars 7: The Empires shameless cash-in

Rant number 316

A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, there was a saga. To start with, that saga was made up of 3 films - and things were pretty sweet. There was lightsabers, pyow pyows a plenty, a dude with a really deep voice and a funky black helmet and a small green man with a speaking disorder.

People loved it - I loved it. There was cool space fights, and toys and stuff. It was awesome.

Then, years later - it was decided that they should make some more movies from within the saga. Due to some slightly quirky marketing in the first place - they had started with the story of film number 4 - which meant they needed to make the first 3 stories.

And make them they did - although in truth they were far from great. They had droids that appeared to be made out of marzipan and fell apart at the first sign of trouble. They had an irritating Rastafarian alien - who is universally hated. They had a superfluous amount of CGI scenes - with little rhyme nor reason and they had some bad acting, bad dialogue and general badness...

None the less, they made them - they surely did.

And after that, they sat back and looked at the 6 films they had made (some great, some crap) and they felt so satisfied that they released about a hundred iterations - with lots of remastering, special features and more CGI than George Lucas than shake a suitably large tree at.

But then - someone thought: I bet we can milk some more money out of this thing -

and they did. Not withstanding the Star Wars Christmas Special (and yes, that really exists,) and the Ewoks spin-off they needed a modern day spin off to milk some more money from the franchise.

So recently - they came up with 'The Clone Wars' film and subsequent TV series (which I haven't watched - so I can't tell you if its good or bad or indifferent. It's probably a bit crap though.)

You'd think that this would do as far as money milking goes.

But its not over it seems. Not by a long shot.

Disney you see - have handed over the cash for the whole franchise and are going to be carrying on with number 7 (and doubtless 8 & 9) and any number of cash ins.

Why can't they leave something great alone. Have they no fucking original ideas at all?

Its most irritating. I just hope that Disney know what they're getting themselves into!

Rant over.