Rant 23 - 23/1/12 Subject: Roadworks

Rant number 23

This is one I literally can not put up with any longer. So rant I must and rant I shall.

Road works.

I understand that wear and tear is going to happen to our very busy road network. 

I understand as such, that , occasionally some repairs will be needed to made to said road network. 

I understand that this may involve at times coning off areas in order to make workers safe.

I understand all of this.

What I do not understand is why it takes so fucking long to do anything and why they need to cone off 74 miles of motor way at a time.

And - if you can explain the above to me. Why oh why (oh why oh why oh why etc) can I never see anyone working.

I've seen people looking at various pieces of equipment, scratching their heads as if to say 'I wonder what this one does, it looks very shiny...,' I've seen people tying themselves to barriers for safety and I've seen people talking in small groups. 

I imagine that somewhere, a species of worker exists that we have never seen. 

I imagine that they have 7 arms, 3 legs and 4 eyes, one on each side of their square heads. 

I would like to think that these workers, (like some kind of yeti) can never be seen by us normal folk - but sneak out in gaps between traffic to do a teeny bit of work - whilst the normal humanoid workers look on in confusion. Because they are so scared of us 'norms' (yes thats what they probably call us) they have to keep hiding again.

This is - to me - the only plausible explanation for why it takes them so long to cover only a small distance of road.

As to why it is required to cone off 74 miles of motorway at once. This is a mystery that I cannot solve.

Currently there are - that affect me on my normal routes:

Roadworks on the road to the motorway: reduced speed by 10mph+1 lane reduced

Roadworks upon my morning commute: reduced speed to 50mph+average speed cameras.

Roadworks on my return journey: reduced speed to 50mph+average speed camera + reduced lane & 10mph reduced speed.

Roadworks going to band: Once again reduced speed by 20mph

Roadworks coming back from back: Once again, reduced speed by 20mph.

Yet more roadworks coming back from band x2 + reduced 1 lane + -10mph.

I just wish they could come up with a better way of doing things, and like - you know work a bit faster.

Or maybe, they could cone off a little bit less - work a bit more efficiently and not drive me round the frickin' bend!

Rant over.

Rant 12 - 12/1/12 Subject: Commuting to work

Rant number 12


I hate bloody commuting. I mean, it makes so little sense.

Don't get me wrong, I need to get to my job - this is kind of essential to doing it - you know, the whole being in the building thing.

My job is also, as with many people - located a difference away from my home - about 11 miles - as the crow flies.

Thus getting from A to B is kind of necessarily.

'So why complain?' - I hear you cry?


Because - in a modern age, in our advanced society - it makes so little sense.

Public transport is total shite & expensive(don't worry, there will be a rant to follow)

As a result, more cars are on our already overflowing roads, each and every day.


And about 99 bloody percent of all the cars want to be on getting to work, school, college, Matalan  or wherever! - between 8.30 and 9 in the morning.

As such - each morning is a struggle against almost insurmountable odds. On the best days, if someone doesn't decide to collide with one of the other thousands of motorists (a sadly rare occurrence) a journey that should take quarter of an hour takes nearer to 50 minutes. On the worst days, it can grow to more than an hour of quarter. A waste of thousands of hours of our time and precious fuel every bloody day.

Surely, at this point in our evolution, we would have managed up with a way of making sure that everyone doesn't need to be going to the same kind of places - all at the same time.

As an alternative of course - the government could actually put some money back into the public services that the nutcracker (Margaret Thatcher) sold off and privatised. This way, they might - you know....actually work.

Then I won't have to sit in traffic, going at 12 miles a frickin hour, burning expensive fuel and getting closer to the point where my road rage will take over, and I will be forced to take my wheel jack out of my boot - and do something horribly inventive with it to that rude guy in the four by four.

It's not going to happen though (well not the investing in public services thing anyway....)

Rant over.