Rant 146 25/5/12 Subject: Packaging

Rant number 146

Today, a long awaited item arrived which is brilliant. I am installing the enclosed software as we speak - now that I have finally got the wrapper off of it. 

It gets me thinking about the amount of packing that crosses through my hands in a week. The jiffy bags, the food wrappers. Is it really all that necessary?

I'm sure in days past, they did without all of this wrapping, but these days its preposterous.

If I get an item from eBay, its often: an item within moulded plastic packaging, held in place by several cable ties, within an outer box (complete with cellophane window) within a jiffy bag.

And where prey does all of that excess packaging go?

Straight in the bin, that's where.

I understand that items need to feature branding and need to travel a long distance safely - but I'm sure that they could cut it down really. I'm sure that I wouldn't be bothered. I don't want the packaging, just the item after all.

Things are surprisingly crude if you think about it. We have to package items against the world in varying ways - but there must be some technology beyond what we are doing. Something lightweight, strong, but easy to reuse or biodegrade. Or an incentive for returning packaging for reuse - I don't know.

Food packaging too is ridiculous. We make nothing locally - and so items need to last for ever, cans, jars, foil packs, vacuum packs - it all takes it toll.

Even the laptop I rant on, came in carefully moulded polystyrene, an anti static pouch, a box, another box and finally another outer box.

We really should think of something better than all of this waste!

Rant over.

Rant 109 18/4/12 Subject: Junk mail (post)

Rant number 109

To begin with, I know I've covered junk mail before. That time though it was about spam emails, this is about the other type.

Not many days pass without me receiving some post of one sort or another. It's rarely anything exiting to be honest, usually just bills or statements. What I seem to always get alongside these though is junk!

Bt always want to give me some amazing deal which is 'too good to miss.'

A local store want to show me their latest amazing offers.

Virgin want to offer me their services despite the fact that they don't have the infrastructure in place to actually provide me the services.

It does my nut in!

We live in a world of tv, Internet, papers and magazines. There is plenty of ways right there to try and titillate and excite me - I don't need it shoving through my front door.

As much as anything, it's a waste of money. I put junk mail straight in the bin (and I would wholeheartedly suggest you do the same,) what then does it accomplish?

One of these days I'm gonna start collecting it, put it in giant envelopes and deliver it back to the idiots - sideways...

Don't junk mail me!

Rant over.

Rant 90 - 30/3/12 Subject: The problem with bottles

Rant number 90


Todays rant is firstly about sauces. I am quite meticulous about them. As far as I am concerned  each meal has a condiment that goes best with it and no variation is allowed!

Bacon sandwiches or fry-ups - brown sauce.
Burgers - Ketchup.
Hotdogs - Mustard & ketchup.
Chicken - Barbeque sauce.
Chinese - Soy sauce.

etc. etc.
Me being so specific about things, means that I - at any time need to have at my disposal quite a few bottles of sauce. That's just fine with me, but the ever bottles creates a problem - and brings me to my point! (Roughly 8 lines of text to get me to the point, is that a waffling record?)

Bottles are wasteful!

Whatever the type of bottle you have, be it traditional hard sided glass or modern, plastic and squidgy -  there is no way to get all of the sauce/beer/oil/whatever out of the bottle. It just bugs me so much!

I hate wastage in all of its forms, and there must be literally a million or or litres of wasted brown sauce, ketchup, special sauce, mayo and a hundred other types of sauce and drinks sitting in bottles - clinging on for dear life.

Its a worldwide problem - someone needs to invent something! I mean, the design of a bottle has been around for ages - and its not exactly evolved.

Glass bottles particularly are a real pain. I know that they are nicer to look at than their plastic counterparts and that they have some kind of historical appeal. The thing is, that they were replaced for a good reason! Strong tasting things like sauces are well housed in a plastic bottle - and can be forced out at will.

Have you ever tried to pour ketchup from a brand new bottle!? Its just impossible, the suction defeats gravity hands down - forcing you to go for the 'knife poke' technique - which I really don't like! The end of the bottle too is always particularly full of wastage - it sucks.

The only things that should be in glass bottles is substances like beer - which can be tainted by outside interference! Even then though - the wastage upsets me no end! I can't even begin to imagine how many pints of wastage I've left in the bottom of bottles over the years.

Come on scientists, sort it out: wastage free bottles need to be invented soon (you can call them wottles if you want, but you will have to pay me for the name - because I have invented that (you read it here people!))

Rant over.

Rant 12 - 12/1/12 Subject: Commuting to work

Rant number 12


I hate bloody commuting. I mean, it makes so little sense.

Don't get me wrong, I need to get to my job - this is kind of essential to doing it - you know, the whole being in the building thing.

My job is also, as with many people - located a difference away from my home - about 11 miles - as the crow flies.

Thus getting from A to B is kind of necessarily.

'So why complain?' - I hear you cry?


Because - in a modern age, in our advanced society - it makes so little sense.

Public transport is total shite & expensive(don't worry, there will be a rant to follow)

As a result, more cars are on our already overflowing roads, each and every day.


And about 99 bloody percent of all the cars want to be on getting to work, school, college, Matalan  or wherever! - between 8.30 and 9 in the morning.

As such - each morning is a struggle against almost insurmountable odds. On the best days, if someone doesn't decide to collide with one of the other thousands of motorists (a sadly rare occurrence) a journey that should take quarter of an hour takes nearer to 50 minutes. On the worst days, it can grow to more than an hour of quarter. A waste of thousands of hours of our time and precious fuel every bloody day.

Surely, at this point in our evolution, we would have managed up with a way of making sure that everyone doesn't need to be going to the same kind of places - all at the same time.

As an alternative of course - the government could actually put some money back into the public services that the nutcracker (Margaret Thatcher) sold off and privatised. This way, they might - you know....actually work.

Then I won't have to sit in traffic, going at 12 miles a frickin hour, burning expensive fuel and getting closer to the point where my road rage will take over, and I will be forced to take my wheel jack out of my boot - and do something horribly inventive with it to that rude guy in the four by four.

It's not going to happen though (well not the investing in public services thing anyway....)

Rant over.